Is it okay if I fall asleep:
Are kisses allowed:
Are pants required:
When are you available for cuddles:
My place or yours:
Will you play with my hair:NOT A REQUIREMENT
Also a laminated and copied version of your average weekly schedule and itinerary will be appreciated, along with three forms of government identification (e.g. health card, driver’s licence, passport, PR card, etc.)
At the STWTS opening, I asked people to write their own captions to street harassers.
From Stop Telling Women to Smile Opening at Fresthetic on April 12, 2013. Brooklyn, NY.
Photos by Tatyana Fazlalizadeh
I re-blogged a picture of a little girl, dressed as Tiana, hugging the face actress who plays Tiana at one of the Disney Parks, and noted that everyone should have their princess. And a few people have now contacted me basically going “no, only straight white people can have princesses if you stick with the classics.”
I am a folklorist, and it’s time for some Fun With Folklore.
First off, very few Princesses/fairy tale heroines who are going to become Princesses because that’s what you do are actually defined by specific physical attributes. You have Snow White, who yes, requires the “skin as white as snow” etc, but that’s to make her an alien beauty and justify the actions of her stepmother. She belongs to the Aarne-Thompson tale type 709, which is commonly referred to as “Snow White,” but which contains a hell of a lot more, including “Bella Venezia”, “Myrsina”, “Nourie Hadig” and “Gold-Tree and Silver-Tree.” All those links will take you to Wikipedia. Click them. Note that NOT ONE of those girls is defined by her appearance, beyond “incredibly beautiful.” “Nourie Hadig” is Armenian in origin; you can bet that girl was not white as snow. (Note that I do not actually care for the “Nourie Hadig” 709 variant, due to using a Roma girl as the main adversary, but that’s another story.) Any story you want to tell is going to have variants where the heroines are never described! You know why?
BECAUSE THE PEOPLE WHO WERE TELLING THESE STORIES UNDERSTOOD THAT IT WAS IMPORTANT FOR CHILDREN TO SEE THEMSELVES IN THE MIRROR OF THE TALE.
There are fairy tales about people with disabilities, ranging from the physical (missing limbs, missing eyes, missing tongues) to the emotional (girls who cannot smile, boys who cannot feel fear). There are fairy tales that end in same-sex marriage. There’s even an excellent fairy tale about gender identity, “The Princess Who Became A Prince,” in which our hero has always felt he was a boy, but tried to be a dutiful daughter, until a dragon stole a neighbor princess and he had to ride to rescue the girl in order to save the kingdom. One misaimed curse later, and wham, our new-minted prince is finally outwardly as he had been all along on the inside.
THIS IS JUST AS OLD AND TRUE AND SCHOLASTIC AS CINDERELLA AND THE OTHERS.
The “big fairy tales” of today are the ones that someone seized on as marketable. We have the power, as drivers of media, to say that we want more diversity. We want Princesses of every race, creed, and religion, and we have the folklore and fairy tales to make them real. We want our transgender Princess (although wow would the marketing be problematic). Saying “the classics” are 100% about straight white people reduces the past to a place where only straight whiteness existed, and where no other children ever needed stories. And that’s not what the past was.
Once upon a time has never stopped being right now.
‘Edgy’ teenage boys preface their online presence with ‘I don’t care if you’re offended’ as if it rails against all that society stands for. Dead baby jokes, rape jokes, beating women jokes, racist jokes, homophobic jokes, holocaust jokes, transphobic jokes, and a host of other ‘material’ is wheeled out over sites like 4chan, Reddit, 9gag, and even Facebook (especially Facebook, with pages dedicated to LAD culture and ‘edgy’ young men’s humour), as though those words are ammo against society by the number of people who say ‘that’s not okay’ or ‘that’s not funny.’
The tragic irony comes from the inarguable fact that such jokes and comments do nothing to transgress society at large. They are anything but radical, or against the grain. They normalise, reinforce and capitalise on expectations and inequalities upon which modern western society are built on. The people who are offended, the ones who call out the bigotry are accused of being ‘silencers,’ as though they are oppressors in cahoots with society to stop our brave white teenage boys from making their edgy jokes, when in reality, their calling out against bigotry is the most transgressive and radical act of any of these exchanges.
Now, when a woman, a person of colour, a trans* person, a person of any other sexuality than straight or another marginalised person of society offends a white, straight, cis man – THAT is a transgressive act. That is when offence becomes radical and political. But if you’re a white boy feeling edgy because you’ve made a joke about Rhianna getting beaten by Chris Brown, you can shut up and go sit in a corner.
Brittney Griner recently became the WNBA’s #1 draft pick, and she also became the first openly gay athlete to sign with Nike. But after NBA star Jason Collins came out publicly and was heralded by many as the first “major out athlete,” Griner’s moment in the spotlight was, at least temporarily, eclipsed. In a powerful essay written for the Sunday New York Times, Brittney finally got the chance to share her story.
I adore her.
Love this woman!
Because [at least in America] you’re not considered an athlete unless you’re a man and play football, basketball, baseball and MAYBE hockey.
“boys will be bo-“
*punches you in the face*
bOYS WILL BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE
These are… actually pretty inspiring.
“you are never taller than when you stand up for yourself”
thats just awesome
“You’re the result of 4 billion years of evolutionary success; F***ING ACT LIKE IT.”
My fave right there.
((I can’t help loving courage wolf or whatever this meme is called.))
- Societal expectations of masculinity
- Societal expectations to provide for women
- No long term reversible male birth control
- Men who are raped are more likely to remain silent and be dismissed or outright laughed at
- Unfair treatment in child custody battles
- No support for male victims of domestic abuse
- Media portrayal of married men as weak morons
Not men’s issues
- The friend zone
- Women not dating you
- “Fucking femnazis”
I suggest all females watch this.
*i suggest all humans watch this.
THIS SHOULD BE REQUIRED WATCHING FOR ALL HUMANS
I’m a 17 year old white guy living in middle class America. I’ve never exactly been a supporter of feminism because that kind of thing has never really affected me personally. I don’t notice it and I don’t care about it. But in nine minutes this video has made what is truly a serious problem extremely apparent. Those “why I need feminism” posts or those slut-shaming or rape culture campaigns never convince me of anything. But this video actually did I think.
tl;dr This video kicks ass, just watch it.
I would like to take this opportunity to point out one thing. This is an example of a male-targeted, vaguely ‘sexist’ commercial campaign that is genuinely funny, and clever enough for women to “get the joke”. These commercials, despite claiming Old Spice was a product for “men” and not ladies, were met with mutual appreciation from men and women, because it is:
A: Not stupid or flat in its humor or message
B: Not degrading to women
C: Genuinely funny
On top of that, these commercials featured a man that was trying to, above all else, make women happy. He wasn’t trying to be a man because “ew being girly is dumb lol,” he was trying to be a man because “oh ladies I would love to impress you.” And even though both of those messages are somewhat traditional ways of viewing and reinforcing gender standards and expectations, that fine line between them makes a world of difference. Many of these pro-men campaigns are too insulting, or too small-minded, or simply not clever enough to make us “get the joke”. But this campaign has humor that appeals to both men and women at the same time, by neither degrading nor bashing either of them. Men can want to be like this man, and woman get to appreciate a man that is like this man. But at the same time, this campaign is too light-hearted and whimsical to hurt anyone’s feelings, so you can easily take it for the hilarious joke it is.
This campaign is not only funny, it’s clever, highly creative, intentionally over the top, and entertaining. Everything that Dr. Pepper’s agonizing “Why don’t women get the joke about our manly soda?” campaign is not.